PARENTS ENCOURAGEMENT AND POSITIVE RE-FRAMING.
Encouragement and positive re-framing focus on your youngster’s strengths and positive intentions.
By demonstrating an unconditional belief in your youngster, you lay the foundation for an “I can do!” attitude (confidence), enthusiasm and motivation for personal growth.
You offer encouragement by words, actions, and feelings. Your kid might need a hug after falling off a swing and some prodding to get back on.
Or perhaps he or she might need you to be lovingly firm through all of the tears before his or her dance class (which, of course, they’d enjoy once there).
Positive re-framing requires that you, as a provider, point out the silver lining to every cloud regarding the hearing impaired.
When a negative or potentially negative situation occurs, you re-define (re-frame) it in such a way that makes the youngster hopeful and motivated towards healthy outcomes.
For example, “You tried so hard to help daddy by carrying a big, full shopping bag. Next time we’ll have you carry a smaller one and maybe we can avoid having the bag rip.”
Encouragement and positive re-framing are especially useful in promoting a youngster’s capacity for self-appraisal.
How Do Parents Use Encouragement And Positive Re-framing?
Those two closely related techniques are often used together. You use them whenever you accurately paint a positive picture of your kid’s efforts and abilities.
With practice, you can identify and underscore positive elements for the young individual in any situation, no matter how bleak it appears.
Choose comments and questions that held your youngsters assess and praise himself, such as, “Aren’t you proud of yourself for studying for your test.”
Make encouraging comments, such as, “You sure did make the dishes sparkle!”
Re-frame discouraging situations; for example, “Yes, you got a D, but it is an honest D – you studied, you really tried and you didn’t cheat. I am proud of you.”
Boosting your kid’s self-confidence helps him have faith in his ability to confront everyday challenges and to create positive outcomes.
Some find it hard to directly accept encouraging comments but can benefit from overhearing/over “seeing” your praise. For example, when Emily is present ask a third party, “Did you know that Emily swam the length of the pool today?”
Another helpful method for interrupting undesirable behaviors and extricating your kid from negative situations is to review positive moments, “I remember when you…”
In this way, you help your youngster remember past successes, renewing his or her faith in their own ability as well as the bright side of life.
MUTUAL RESPECT AND EMPATHY
Mutual respect builds your kid’s self-esteem and sensitivity to others. Empathy, the ability to understand another’s point of view, is a necessary skills for building healthy relationships.
Parents can best teach their child about mutual respect and empathy by demonstrating respect and understanding for him or her, for their feelings, thoughts, and experience.
Though this sounds simple, accepting a hearing impaired individual fully means accepting the child’s deafness.
If parents are shocked, saddened, confused or angry about their kid’s condition, then the parents should seek help to cope with these feelings.
In addition, the hearing family must learn to accommodate the hearing impaired toddler’s communication needs, which does not happen overnight.
Therefore, a parent might have gaps in understanding how his youngster thinks and feels about things.
This doesn’t indicate the absence of mutual respect, it indicates a communication problem that will require more patience and time to resolve.
The results are worth the investment of time and patience.
Families that base their relationships on mutual respect and empathy have an easier time living together, cooperating, and learning from one another.
How Do Parents Build Respect With And Have Empathy For Their Child?
You convey respect (or lack of it) for your deaf kid by many of your daily actions. You fail to respect your youngster when you talk down to him or her; purposely embarrass them; laugh at their efforts; exclude them from family communication; or look through their private belongings without asking permission.
You convey respect by soliciting and listening to your youngster’s opinion, by allowing him or her the latitude to negotiate his communication needs, express clothing preferences, choose friends, and pursue hobbies.
You want to send the message that you value his or her taste and individuality. You demonstrate your respect for them through myriad of subtle actions.
But not rushing to your deaf youngster’s rescue when he or she is trying to solve a math problem, repair a broken toy, or construct a Lego skyscraper, you show respect for (and confidence in) his independent efforts and accomplishments.
Parents and caregivers should show empathy (understanding), not sympathy (pity), for challenges and obstacles that come their way due to his or her hearing loss.
HUMOR AND AFFECTION
Find ways to laugh, love, and in short, enjoy your hearing impaired child. All of the parental worrying, drudgeries, schedules, and heartaches should be balanced by laughter, affection, excitement, and joy.
There are no rules that say parents must always be serious.
Allow your child to rekindle your playfulness – tickle, giggle, joke, go sledding, hug, love, and be downright goofy whenever you get the chance.
Love, humor, and affection can go a long ways in regards to raising a child with hearing loss.
How parents can use humor and affection?
Love, cherish, and accept your child simply because he is himself or herself. Your child needs to know that even when he or she misbehave you still love them.
This gives them the message that you may not love some of their behaviors, but you will always love them.
This enables your child to take risks, practice problem-solving skills, and examine his behavior, without worrying whether their efforts will affect your show of affection.
Physical and emotional affection are key components of parenting. Verbal and nonverbal expressions of your feelings show your child that your support and love are everlasting.
Such actions as saying “I love you,” hugging, kissing, or affectionately playing with your child’s hair (especially when he or she is not expecting it) tell them just how special and important he is to you.
Never overlook the value of humor. Like playful playing, laughter, joking, and daily silliness greatly restore perspective.
When parents defuse tension by seeing the lighter side of a problem, children feel less threatened and take more risks in examining their difficulties.
NEVER make a joke out of your hearing impaired child – it is not funny to be ‘sacrificed’ for the sake of a good laugh.
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